Camp Hetalia!
by blazingblondemannequin
Summary: Welcome to Camp Hetalia, a Camp for the Axis and Allies to spend there summer in the beautiful islands of Seychelles! Ahh, so relaxing. Not! Read all about the drama, backstabbing, and more shocking things!
1. Introduction

After watching how the Axis and Allies reacted on her island, Seychelles decided to anomalously host a summer camp back on her island. After all, those boys had no idea where they were, so she could figure it out. Secretly though, she did have a crush on a couple of them. And others looked kind of familiar… So Seychelles talked it out with her boss, and she told him that she wanted to observe them so her country could have a stronger military, more food, etc.. Of course, she did leave out the part about having crushes on them, because her boss all thought they were lunatics. But he agreed so they sent out the invitations.


	2. Part I: Invitations Chapter 1: Kitty

In Italy, Romano had said that Germany couldn't come with Italy today, because he was sick. Italy wanted to go around town with Germany, so he went with Romano instead. Romano just wanted to eat tomatoes, so they agreed on going to an art museum then going to a farmers market to pick out some tomatoes for Romano.

"Big brother! Big brother!" Italy shouted, "Look at this lovely painting! It has a bunch of pretty woman in it!".

"I don't care! Let's just get out of here and get some tomatoes!" Romano shouted.

Italy didn't hear him, because he was talking to the women in the painting. "Oh I know, mhmm, mhmm." Italy swooned.

"Italy!" Romano shouted even more annoyed than before. By now, Italy was talking to a couple of real women.

"Hey you ladies are cute! Do you want to come with me and my brother to the farmers market? We can get some tomatoes and you can come home with us and I'll make you pasta-"

Italy was cut off by Romano dragging him away.

The ladies blushed, while one said "Oh that boy was so adorable, offering to make us pasta."

"I really did want to go home with him, he did look fairly large." the other responded. The ladies giggled and walked away.

Back at the farmers market, Romano was even more angry because he thought the tomatoes were overpriced. They bought a crate anyway, so Romano and Italy sat down in front of a cafe to eat the tomatoes.

Italy's cat came walking towards him with a letter in his mouth.  
"Oh kitty!" Italy squealed and took the letter from the cat's mouth.

Romano glanced over and asked, "Wha doz da letter sawy?" with tomatoes in his mouth.

Italy opened the letter and read it. "Oh Romano!" he squealed, "We have been invited to a summer camp on the island Germany, Japan, and I were stranded on!".

Romano swallowed and shouted "Count me out! I don't want to be stuck on some stupid island with that asshole Germany!".

Italy got a little sad, because his brother wasn't going and that his brother called Germany an asshole.

Romano felt kind of bad making his brother sad and wanted to get rid of him and said "But you should go, then you could play with Germany over the summer.".

"Really?! Germany will be there?!" Italy squealed. He ran off to go pack his bags.

Romano smirked and continued to eat.


	3. Part I: Invitations Chapter 2: Grenades

Germany checked is bag. "Okay, so I have my grenades, my gun..." he mumbled to himself.

Germany was planning to go sightseeing around Italy with Italy. He wasn't all that excited to go, after seeing what happened to Japan. As he was getting ready to go to Italy, the sound of Japan's "Pastaaaa..." rang through his ears.

He was shivering, going out the door telling himself "It's for Italy, It's for Italy, It's for Italy…".

Then the phone rung and Germany assumed it was Italy himself asking how to tie his shoelaces, because it would be a while until Germany got there.

Germany picked up the phone and sighed, "The long shoelace goes around the loop Italy.".

"What?" the phone replied, "This is Romano. I wanted to tell you that Italy was sick and can't go sightseeing with you. So don't come bastard!". The phone then went to the disconnected tone.

Germany felt sad and relived at the same time. "Um, vell… Okay then," He stuttered as he put down the phone.

The blonde man sat back down on his couch. "Vhat do I even do vith myself vhen I'm alone... I never remember being alone before," after sitting on the couch for awhile, he came up with a list to decide what to do. 1. Train 2. Blow something up in England 3. Masturbate 4. Text my mom.

"Okay," pondered Germany "Vell, the first 2 look okay, but who's idea was it to text my mutti? Vhatever, I'll just go train now." he headed out the door and started to do laps around the block.

"This is lame. I'm just gonna throw some grenades into Britain."

He jogged all the way from Germany to England's boarder, no use in any kind of travel, right? Pulling out the plug of the grenade, he threw it into English territory.

Germany continued to throw grenades, until he pulled out one that had a note attached to it. "Vhat's this..." he said reading the note. "Summer camp..." he said thinking that he was 20 instead of 10.

"Vell, I've got nothing better to do." he shrugged, returning home to pack. Germany had left before England had come in, spazzing out about the grenades.


	4. Part I: Invitations Chapter 3: Groceries

At the market, Japan was shopping for some food. He didn't need much though, because he was planning to be by himself for the summer. That was just the way he liked it.

"Okay, so I need some bread and cerear down this isre..." he said to himself. Japan slowly moved the cart along, putting in the bread and cereal as he came to it.

"Next I need mirk and yogurt...oh." he looked up from his list to see two teenage girls chatting. Japan smiled to himself, glad that they were having a great time. He watched and eavesdropped in or their conversation.

"So Miki went up to him and said, you better leave her alone, she's not interested." one girl said.

The other replied "Really? But when did Mizuki come into this?".

The first girl nodded, "Well she walked in and..." she turned to see that Japan was staring at them. "Hey, that old man is staring at us… Let's go somewhere else.". The two off them walked away, glancing back at Japan to make sure he didn't follow them.

He sighed as he went through the self checkout. 'Why is it that everyone avoids me? I hope I don't rook suspicious…'. Japan placed his foods in the paper bags and walked outside.

'Maybe they think I'm an old pervert…'. A blush grew on his face, and he kept his head down as he began to walk, thinking about how much of a closet pervert he really was.

The birds chirped as he walked through the streets, then to the park for a shortcut to his home. After walking, he took a quick rest on the bench.

"Ah…" Japan sighed, looking up at the cherry blossom trees. He squeezed his groceries, making the paper bag rustle. Looking down to make sure his food was okay, he spotted an odd letter sticking out.

"What is this?" he cocked his head, taking the envelope out to examine it. Opening the letter, he read the small print. 'A summer camp? I don't think so, I've got prenty to do at home. Prus, I don't rike being around peopre too much…'.

Stuffing the letter back in the bag, he looked up to see a group of at least 5 school girls with crazy colored clothes, full of flower and feathers, and orange tan covering parts of their skin, forming strange pale shapes.

He looked away, thinking about all the crazy Japanese fads that had been going around lately, 'Summer camp it is…'.


	5. Part I: Invitations Chapter 4: Neighbor

America yawned and stretched, for he had just woken up. He glanced over at the clock. '12 am… I'm up early!'.

Grinning and jumping out of the bed, America turned on his radio. Instantly, the Harlem Shake began to play.

"YEAH BABY! DO THE HARLEM SHAKE!" he screamed, and began to jump and shake around. As usually, he shook his rickety apartment from his "dancing". His neighbor, Mrs. Granger, sighed as she continued to wash her dishes. The walls in this building were very thin, so she could here everything he said. America did have a loud voice after all.

After spazzing around his bedroom to the popular song, America slipped on his jeans and handmade "I'm the hero!" shirt. Every time he wore this shirt, it reminded him of how he made "Back-up sidekick" shirts for everyone else in the Allies, but they never seemed to wear them.

As usual, he shrugged off this thought and ran to the fridge. "Uh… lets see…", he said opening the door. America pulled out a frozen meal of bacon, eggs, and a hash down patty, and shoved it into the microwave.

He then jumped on his pea green couch, turning on the TV, Jeff Bridges, the morning newscaster. "Yesterday night, the DAL building on the corner of Chestnut and 6th street burned completely down. The police suspect-"

"Boooooring!" America yelled out to the television. He continued to channel surf, and get his breakfast from the microwave. "Bowing! Bowing!" he said, continuing to flip and shoving the bacon into his mouth. America grinned after five minutes, when he had finally reached Spongebob Squarepants.

"Alright! One of my favorites!". He leaned back into the couch and began screaming out the lines. "But Sandy! It was and ALASKAN! BULL! WORM!". He laughed and continued to yell out the character's lines. "Hahaha! That Squidward guy is a lot like England! He's all stuck up and boring and no fun!".

After eating breakfast and watching his cartoons, he popped in his Halo 2 disc and chomped on some over-processed sweets and salty snacks.

"No you idiots! Return to the base! Cover me! Cover me!" he screamed into his headset. "You douchecanoes! Fire at the other team!".

Mrs. Granger had just about has enough. She collected her mail from the slot and knocked on her neighbors door. "America…?". He didn't hear her.

"Oh yeah! Pew pew pew! Now you're dead!" he laughed.

She sighed. 'Must be playing one of his video games again.'. Knocking louder at the door, she yelled "America!".

"Oh hold on a sec guys, my sexy girlfriend with huge tits is at the door.". He grinned and paused the game, then opened up his door "What's up bra?".

Mrs. Granger rolled her eyes. "You're being dreadfully loud again. Please quiet down.".

"Oh uh, sorry…" America replied, the same thing he said every time she came over to complain.

Sighing, she let another neighborly disturbance slide. "Also, some of your mail accidentally got into my slot.". She handed him the letter and left to finish washing the dishes.

"Oh sweet dude!". He slammed the door and ran over too his couch. "I hope it's money!" he ripped open the envelope and pulled out the letter. 'Aw, just a dumb letter…' he thought beginning to read.

"Wait dude! Summer camp?! Alright! This will be awesome! I'll beat everyone at the camp games and stuff!". He grinned and ran off to his bedroom, throwing random items into a duffel bag for camp.

Canada entered the room, seeing the mess his brother had left. He bent over, beginning to clean as he always did. "Wow, good for him… I hope he has a lot of fun.".

America ran by him to grab more food for the trip, bumping into Canada and making him drop all of the wrappers and food on the floor.

He sighed. 'Oh America…'.


	6. Part I: Invitations Chapter 5: Paperwork

"Bloody hell! How dare that git Germany bomb my territory! Especially when I was just enjoying a nice cup of tea!" shouted England, as he stormed off from the place Germany had thrown his grenades. "Some people…" he mumbled, stomping back into his house.

"Welcome home Master Kirkland," bowed one of his maids.

Yes, Arthur being a "closet" pervert, and having plenty of money, he hired a bunch of English Maids, and made them wear slutty uniforms. No, not French Maids. God how he hated the French, even more than he hated someone interrupting his tea time.

"Yes, yes, hello. Will you bring an Earl Grey, no sugar, up to my study?". Also liking to appear rich and fancy, he called places like an ordinary home office his "study". It just went along with the maids nicely.

He walked into his office, sighing and rubbing his temples. "I'm so tired of my work, I just need a break for a little bit…" England spoke to himself, flipping through a travel guide. He'd already been to everywhere in the UK, and was convinced that it was the only place that was fun to go to. Well, England anyway, he hated visiting his brothers, especially Ireland and Scotland.

"Mr. Kirkland, I have your tea prepared," entered the maid from earlier, carrying tea in a nice white tea set with roses and blue swirls.

"Yes, thank you love." England sighed, still looking at all of his paperwork.

She set down the tray of tea and crumpets and left.

He slouched down in his seat, pouring the tea into the cup, and spilling some on his starched white shirt.

"Shit! That's hot!". England bolted up, "Bloody- ah…!" he screamed, running off to the bathroom to cool off the stain.

"Ah…" he said, feeling his red skin being cooled off. "I'm such a twat…" he mumbles and rubbed his light blonde hair. "Honestly, I don't know what's wrong with me lately.".

England looked up in his mirror, framed with wavy black marble. He could see his dark circles under his electric green eyes and his thick and dark eyebrows. Under that was his normal nose, and his slightly frowning, always disapproving mouth. "I am an English gentleman, after all, I shouldn't be falling apart like this.". That was always his way to get him back going again, because he prided so much in being a gentleman, and English of course.

But even now he had to admit that he was doing lots of work, because his boss was keeping him so busy. On top of that, he was busy arranging things for America, because he was too lazy to do it himself. "Honestly, that wanker better step up his game if he wants to stay the U.S. rep." he muttered, slipping off his shirt and looking down at his toned chest, with a slightly red part on his abs where he the tea was spilt. Once again, he become more depressed, comparing his brother Scotland's huge muscles to his lean ones. Today was not just a good day for the British nation.

Putting on a new shirt, he began working through his paperwork. Mostly bills and land conformations, but then he dug down to something interesting. A letter. "A letter? For me?" he looked at the address first, wondering who would send him this kind of mail. It didn't say who it was from, but it said it was from the country of Seychelles.

"God! I wonder if that slag Seychelles is begging me back to take care of her!". A small smile grew on his face from this. England loved being in control of people and things, because he felt so powerful that way. But the days of him owning almost every country in the world are over.

England opened the letter, and read the colorful note left inside for him. "Summer camp? That disgusting! Being stuck out all day, with sweltering heat and bugs! Forget it! I'm not going!" he yelled. England tossed the paper near by trash can, or at least next to it. "Summer camp, peh… that tart thinks she can lure me over, she's wrong as hell.".


	7. Part 1: Invitations Chapter 6: Girl

"Ohohohoho, and who might you be~?" France smirked, leaning by a girl in a French market.

"Get away from me, pervert." the girl glared, pushing him away and carrying her food away from the Frenchman.

France sighed as he sat down on a black shiny bench. None of the ladies were being receptive to his charm. Was something wrong? Did he need to shave? Use different cologne? Who could say. It was time for plan B.

Francis pulled out a rose, and collapsed to the stone-path ground. "A lonely man I must be, trapped alone in a dark cold world, with nobody to love!". He shed a fake tear, wrapping his arms around himself. "How can I go on?!" France tilted his head up, eyes full of tears, to look at the crowd.

But nobody seemed to care. Except for one familiar girl.

She had wavy blonde hair, just like France's, but shorter. A white lilly was tucked behind her ear. Her blue eyes shone brightly, the same color of the bright blue sky. The girl wore a used to be snow white dress that feel loosely right above her knees, but was now slightly ripped and dirty. Her small bare feet were positioned in a curious way, just like the rest of her body. Her face, scarred and burned like the rest of her body, held a sad smile as she looked at the Frenchman. And France knew exactly who this girl was.

"J-Joan…?" he muttered, forgetting completely about the show that he was putting on a minute ago.

Joan of Arc. His one true love. The one who helped him speak to God and helped the weak country fight throughout the Hundred Years War. Spending time with her made him the happiest man on earth. But she was captured by the English and was burned at the stake when she was 19. So how was she standing here now?

As France wobbly stood up, staring at the beautiful girl in awe, he noticed that she held a letter, with a light pink envelope in her hand.

Joan looked back at him, the smile still on her face. She bent her head slightly forward, then took off down the cobbled streets of the markets.

"Joan! Wait…!" France outstretched and arm to her, then took after the running girl.

Even though Joan had such a petite and delicate figure, she was very athletic. Easily, she swerved through people, her dress flapping behind her. France lost her countless times, from bumping into people.

"Hey, watch it! I've got produce to sell here!" a man screamed as France ran into his cart of vegetables.

"Désolé!" (Sorry) he shouted back, continuing to push past people.

Eventually Joan had ran out of the market, and started going through the alley ways of the buildings. This made it a lot harder for France to track her down, because there were so many alleys, and they were twisty and long. Not to mention the boxes and trashcans in his way.

"J-Joan…!" he panted, almost out of breath. He couldn't run any further. The poor man watched as his true love dashed away, leaving him along once again.

France hung his head and buried his face in his hands. 'What have I done…?'. As his eyes watered, he saw a glimpse of something pink on the ground. The letter she had been carrying! France snatched it up from the ground, quickly but carefully opening it. An invitation to summer camp. Usually, France wasn't one for the heat, the bugs, and all of the filth, but Joan surpassed all of that.

A small smile came to his face has he held the letter to his chest and quietly cried. "Joan… I will come for you.".


End file.
